Gas Man

Let me just put it out there: Dave has gas issues.

Last month, Dave was on the phone with Loretta, his work wife, when he ran out of gas on the highway. The car started sputtering. He realized what was happening just as he was passing an exit. He jumped on the exit ramp and coasted downhill to the end of the ramp. He turned right and coasted into the gas station and up to the pump. Then laughed his ass off at his pure luck and extreme folly.

So last night I woke up about 3AM, rolled 2 kids off me and turned on my electric blanket. My electric blanket is a recent purchase. It’s a twin rather than a king, because Dave made it abundantly clear that he didn’t want any more heat on his side of the bed. Anyway, when I got up, the thermostat read 59 degrees. Yes, 59 degrees. Guess who forgot to get the gas company to fill up our tank? Yup, the one w/o the electric blanket on his side of the bed.